Good Night
by The Ablazing Arrow
Summary: Jade's sick. She has been for a while, but never told anyone what the real cause is. Her life could end at any moment and she's facing the biggest dilemma of her life besides her illness. Should she tell Cat how she feels about her, or keep it to her possible future grave? Cade.
1. Prologue

**Title: **Good Night (Don't Let the Bed Bugs Bite)

**Summary: **Jade's sick. She has been for a while, but never told anyone what the real cause is. Her life could end at any moment and she's facing the biggest dilemma of her life besides her illness. Should she tell Cat how she feels about her, or keep it to her possible future grave?

**Pairing(s): **Cade (Cat/Jade)

**Genre: **Tragedy/Angst/Romance

**Rating: **T

* * *

"What's wrong, Ms. West?"

What's wrong? _What's wrong?_ What kind of a stupid fucking question was that? Jade wanted to lash out at the aging doctor for asking such a ridiculous thing, but that would be useless. It was a doctor's protocol to ask their patient that question to see what the problem was so they could try to figure out how to solve it. She couldn't blame him.

With a sigh, Jade explains why she is here in this depressing room in this depressing hospital, a scowl on her face for sitting in such an uncomfortable chair for a long ass time. "The pain's getting worse, doc. My bones feel like they're turning into dust. I'm so tired some days I can't even move out of bed. My fevers keep on coming back. On the way I threw up twice," tears brimmed in her eyes, but she fought them down; there's no way in hell she was going to start feeling sorry for herself, "I'm getting worse."

Dr. Jameson nods, writing what she says on a clipboard. When she finishes telling him her symptoms, he gives her a sympathetic look. "You've already had four treatments in the past two weeks, including the treatment you've received two days ago. If we were to give you another round then you won't even be able to rouse out of bed. Your body wouldn't be able to handle the radiation."

_Then how am I still walking?_

"I-I know that," Jade says hollowly, but then changes her tone to assertiveness, the manner she always had when she talked. "I remember when you told my parents and me the schedule for my chemo. That's not what I came here for. That over-the-counter crap you've prescribed me for my pain isn't working anymore; I need something stronger."

The man nodded, smiling at her fiery attitude; he always admired someone who stood up for what he or she wanted. By the sound of her voice, she sounded like she hadn't given up, unlike some of his patients. "All right, Ms. West. I can prescribe you a new pain medication. Tell me, on a scale of one to ten, how severe your pain is."

"Umm, a six on my worst days."

"Six," he repeated. Jade nods and watched him pick up his clip board once again and writing on a piece of paper. "Okay Ms. West, you will have to take 20 milligrams of Oxycodone every morning. How does that sound?"

"Peachy," she replied sarcastically. This earns her a laugh from the older man. The jolly sound causes her to smile, even for a brief moment.

"You know Jade – with your mind-set and all – I believe you will overcome this." Dr Jameson sincerely said.

Jade wondered briefly if he was saying this to try to encourage her to retain her stubbornness or merely try to brace her for the worst days yet to come, but he appeared to be sincere. That or he was a damn good actor.

The young woman nods in agreement. "I know, Dr. Jameson. I will not go down without a fight," for a brief moment, her eyes show weakness. Her voice threatens to crack. "I'm not ready to die."

* * *

Jade's parents were waiting for her in the waiting room (of course.) Her mother is waiting anxiously for her as her father is talking to a business partner through his phone, his trophy wife clutching to his hand. Seeing the blond her dad married caused her stomach to twist into knots. Her bluish-green eyes flashed. Her signature scowl returned.

She couldn't believe how he could just think it was appropriate for her stepmother to tag along. The woman wasn't present on the day she was diagnosed with cancer or her treatments, so why was she here now? It's not like she could have possibly cared – she had her son to take care of. Jade remembered her half brother was probably at soccer practice or whatever the little snot did in his free time. Perhaps she was there because she had nothing better to do. Whatever the reason was, Jade didn't want her there. Period.

Upon seeing her return, Jade's mother stood up. "What happened?"

Mr. West followed his ex-wife's actions, which also caused Sarah to stand. For a moment, Jade thought she saw pity in the woman's eyes, but brushed it off. "He said I'm supposed to take one of these a day," she holds up the bottle of Oxycodone. The small tablets inside jiggled. "Enough for a month. Can we go?"

"Yes, we can." Ms. West stood next to her daughter. She brought a hand to rest on Jade's shoulder, guiding her to the entrance. In normal circumstances, she would have fought against the contact, but she was so exhausted she didn't.

As the mother and daughter entered Jade's mother's car, she noticed her father and his wife enter their own car. Anger built inside her. What exactly were their intentions for coming? Comfort? The said about five words when they arrived. They were as comforting as a sack of potatoes.

_Does he really think showing up at every treatment will make up for all the other times he wasn't there for me?_ She thought bitterly.

Although she wanted to bash at him mentally for acting like this, she only clips on her belt, closes her eyes, and leans against the seat. What she learned from being sick was that bitter thoughts about people brought pain into her body. It was always a different part – the last time, a mere four hours ago she can recall her chest convulsing into what felt like a heart attack if someone so young could have one. Jade swallowed three pills; they didn't work.

It was as if some god was telling her to not think of such thoughts anymore.

She knew that possibility was redundant. She didn't care much for religion, but she settled for that. Since then, she tried her best to try to stay positive and not fill her mind with irritating people.

That wasn't an easy task when she was surrounded by idiots.

* * *

"Are you hungry?"

Jade looks away from the television and at her mother; her blue eyes were shining with the need to take care of her daughter. "Not really Mom," when she sees her face become crestfallen, she quickly says, "actually, I'll have whatever you made."

Ms. West's face brightened noticeably. "Gimme a sec!" She disappears from the doorframe, leaving Jade alone in her room.

She sighed crossly. In reality, she was not hungry in the slightest. Since her treatment began, her appetite dwindled each day. Most days she would nibble on whatever her mom made. Jade knew she was losing weight because of this.

Standing up, she walks over to a mirror to see how much weight she lost in the past two weeks. Jade inwardly cringed at her appearance. Indeed, she was losing weight. From what she looked like, she had appeared to lose fifteen pounds – her thighs were shrinking as well as her stomach. Girls would kill to be as thin as she was, but they didn't realize what was going on in her body, what torture she was going through. Her eyes travel upwards, resting on her face, staring into her own eyes. Dark bags contrasted against her skin; the normal slight tan color had become an unnatural pale. The icing on the cake was her hair, she mused. The normally dark and luscious locks were becoming stringy, like she hadn't washed her hair in days.

Her pale hand went up to gingerly stroke some raven strands. Jade's eyes close momentarily, recalling the day when Dr. Jameson explained to her and her family about the treatment plan.

* * *

"_I'm sorry Jade, but you indeed have Leukemia."_

_The news hits Jade like a ton of bricks, but her face remains emotionless. Ms. West on the other hand bursts into tears. Mr. West becomes solemn, but other than that, he remains as emotionless as his daughter._

"_How would you treat her?" He asks gruffly._

"_If you would to agree to the treatment, we plan on treating you twice a week on Tuesdays and Thursdays." Dr. Jameson is paying attention to Jade rather than her dad. "The side effects of the chemotherapy are, and not limited to, changes in appetite, fatigue, nausea, vomiting, and hair loss."_

"_We'll take it," Mr. West says._

_Dr. Jameson's demeanor changed. "Mr. West, this decision is up to your daughter," he said coldly._

_All eyes rest on Jade. She appeared surprisingly calm, but inside so many thoughts was rushing through her mind. _

_She has Leukemia._

_Leukemia out of all the damn things she could have. A month ago, Jade felt fine. Jade felt _healthy_. She only started to feel ill two weeks ago. Her mother thought it was only the flu. The symptoms she felt made her believe it was the flu too. Yet, here's her doctor telling her she has a fatal disease._

_That's her next thought: the possibility of dying. She knows people who are diagnosed with cancer usually die, but it's not entirely impossible. People do make it through. _

_Jade has such of a tough outer shell that people usually write her off as a heartless bitch, but Jade's a human. She has fears, desires, dreams, and the sheer will to live just like everyone else. Despite priding herself for being different than the crowd, she has the same eternal fear as them; she's afraid to die. _

_She never thought about dying before (the subject of killing is usually directed to her worst enemies with her being the causer), but the actual possibility of her going down that route at such a young age is terrifying._

_Numbly, Jade swallows a lump down her throat. "When can we start?"_

* * *

She wonders when her hair will start to fall out.

Out of all of the feelings she has felt, the one that's most prominent is the thought of her hair coming out strand by strand. Sure, Jade can handle the other symptoms. When she returned home the night she was diagnosed, she decided she wanted to have things remain the same as much as possible. So far, no one has learned of the news she was told besides her parents. And Sarah. They all respected her wishes of keeping this a secret. But her Dad had obviously told his wife, which infuriated her. He calmly explained that she needed to know where he was going.

Jade had said, with as much sarcasm she could,_ "Yes, because we wouldn't want her to think you were cheating on her."_

It's easy to explain her other symptoms. She could say she has a very severe case of the flu. Her raven fair falling out is not so easy to fool. That's the usual sign of someone being treated with chemo.

There's a prominent fear in the back of her mind every time she showers that a clump of hair will tangle themselves around her fingers as she washes her hair. She hasn't taken a shower in four days due to this. Jade decided to take a shower today, knowing that very, very soon her hair will start to disappear. She doesn't want to wear a wig, but who knows? She might start shopping for one for all she knew.

She cannot stand to take a lingering look; Jade feels herself pitying her poor looks. The movie she was watching had returned playing a long time ago. She has no idea what's going on, but she'll find a later showing of it. Jade settles back into bed, plopping against a pillow.

Jade's mother returns with soup. For a split second, she thought if looked green, but it wasn't.

"Chicken noodle soup," he mother says, handing her the bowl. Jade's grateful she was given a small one.

"Thank you."

Her mother placed a kiss on her forehead. "Your welcome baby. I love you."

What she says next isn't filled with sarcasm; it's genuine. "Love you too," she cannot help herself, "now don't leave a liptick stain."

* * *

Her mother wasn't as nurturing as she was now. Most days she was working, leaving for work at the time Jade woke up and often not showing up for dinner. Of course, her demeanor changed upon learning her daughter's disease. Jade had not seen her leave for work ever since the day she was diagnosed. When she woke up, a breakfast was prepared for her and when she returned, she was asked how her day days. At first, Jade was creeped out, promptly asking, _"Who are you and what have you done with Mom?"_

Ms. West said she would go back to work on Monday, the same time as Jade when she left, though would only have half a day, giving enough time for her to return before Jade returned.

Jade groans and pushes the bowl of soup away. Her appetite wasn't as bad as she had thought; she managed to finish half of it, but her stomach churns in discomfort. Oh how much she wanted to vomit it out, but she doesn't. She needed as much energy she could muster.

She knows she should go and freshen up for bed, but fatigue has returned. Jade managed to get up and turn off the light. By the time she returned, her head is dizzy. All she wanted to do was sleep. In the morning, she would take a shower. It was better anyway; she would look fresher on Monday.

Jade falls asleep quickly. The television is still playing when her mother returns. She smiles sadly upon seeing the soup only half-finished, but it was a lot better than the last few days. Maybe Jadelyn was getting better!

Ms. West leans down, placing another kiss on her daughter's forehead. "Good night," she whispered quietly.

* * *

_No Cade in this chapter. It's mostly a prologue; the story will pick up next chapter._

_Thanks for reading!_


	2. I

**In case if you were wondering what type of leukemia Jade has, it's called Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL).**

* * *

Jade isn't sure what time it is when she wakes up. All she knows is the sun is shining on her face through a small crack between the curtains from her window, prodding itself through her eyelids. She moans in discomfort and rolls over to her other side, trying her best to shy away from the light in her half-asleep daze. The teenager snuggles her face deeply into her pillow, but sleep doesn't return to her; in the short amount of time she was somewhat awake Jade remembers the previous day of her doctor's instructions. Though she could return to snooze, she doesn't want to later suffer from her procrastination. Grunting, she sits up, rubbed the sleep from her eyes, and then glanced around the room, trying to remember where she placed the pills.

_I better not have lost them already or I swear I'll…_

The thought doesn't finish. The pills are placed at the edge of her bed, sitting erect as if waiting for her to take the first one. Jade sits up, knocking the pills to the edge. For a moment she imagines the bottle rolling over and hiding underneath. She reaches over and picks up the small bottle. Curiously, she rereads what's printed on the label, only to see it was the same things Dr. Jameson told her: Oxycodone. Thirty 20-miligram pills.

With fingers beginning to ache, Jade fumbles with opening the bottle. At a point she considered using a pair of scissors to pry the top loose, but after another try, it pops off. She pours a single tablet out, but then sighed in frustration. Unlike the round aspirins, these pills were oval-shaped and quite thick. Jade didn't plan on getting up for a while, only to try to go back to rest some more, but she didn't have much of a choice. It was either swallow it and risk choking or go downstairs for a glass of water. Wouldn't that be ironic of her dying from that than her illness?

_No, you're not going to die! Stop acting like a little crybaby._

While forcing the thought out Jade slowly but surely climbs out of bed, holding the bottle and the cap in hand. Regrets consume her mind for not taking a shower, or at least stripping off the previous day's clothes when she feels her shirt and jeans cling to her sticky-with-sweat body. The feeling a person when you've been outside all day in nothing but the same attire performing hard labor, and multiply that by ten. She groans, instantly wanting to strip out and go out in her birthday suit if she had to, but doesn't. She's always felt comfortable in her own skin, but lately she knew she looked nothing like herself a month ago. Like healthy and happy Jade. Emotions of self-pity devoured inside at any glance, just like last night. But thankfully mascara and eyeliner would cover most of her appearance and make her "Jade-like". That didn't help stop the questions of her lost weight.

She gets up and leaves the room. There's no sign of her mother when she reached the kitchen. She was probably in her room, or possibly in the study, doing the work she needed to catch up on. Jade's fine with that. Mrs. West was really becoming overbearing. Although she was sick, she still wanted–_needed_–her space. The woman was suffocating her. Well, at least she cared.

Before doing anything else, she puts the cap back on the bottle and sets it down on the counter. Jade picks up a glass from the dish rack, fills it up with water from the tab, and puts the pill in her mouth. She was bringing up the glass to her lips and letting the water fill her mouth when she heard an excited squeal, followed by "Jadey!"

Her eyes widen in shock. Breath hitching, the pill that started to go down regurgitates back up. Some water dribbles down her lip and onto her shirt. It took all of her strength to prevent her hand from losing the grip on the glass of water. Really, she didn't expect to hear anything other than the clinking of her glass. It was what, 9:00 in the morning? 10? No one in their right mind is excited like that! "Jesus!" She shrieks out. The shock wears off after a few moments. Instead, irritation replaces the shock she initially felt. She glares upwards, half-expecting her mother to be at the entrance of the kitchen (which was an outrageous theory to begin with, considering she walked around with an attitude of "don't talk to me without my first cup of coffee" much like herself.) But no, it wasn't. The person had a slim figure, straight velvety-red hair, and big, brown eyes. Cat Valentine. Her best friend. Seeping with anger, Jade wipes the spilt water from her bottom lip as well as her chin and demanded, "Cat, what the fuck are you doing here?"

Cat flinches visibly, making Jade feel somewhat bad for her outburst. "What's that suppose to mean!"

Huh, the tables have turned. Now _she's_ demanding for something. Jade should've seen that coming. She was always so self-conscious of someone if they asked a question worded wrongly. Now though, Jade supposed she should have seen that coming also. Her treatment to the girl was different from everyone else. There was always a certain tenderness she treated her with. Yet, there was always a limit to this. Like now, which is why she didn't hold back.

"I'm asking why you're here. You only come here when _I_ tell you to. So answer now before I report you to the cops."

"Oh! Well, I wanted to see you, since you don't go out very much anymore… your mom called me and asked me to come over while she went out. I thought we could hang out for the day… I'm sorry I scared you Jadey!" Cat apologized.

Jade sighs. Of course her mother would have someone come over to make sure she wasn't—God forbid—home alone. Sure she was sick and all, but she wasn't a damn little kid. She could take care of herself she always kept telling the woman. But she never listened to her reasoning.

"It's all right, Cat," Jade found herself softening up. "How long have you been here?"

"Not very long," she says, "your mom left ten minutes ago. I just went to the bathroom. I was gonna go watch a movie and wait for you to wake up, but now you did!" She's smiling widely. Jade's not sure if it's her influential half-asleep mind being affected by Cat's sickly-sweet attitude being contagious, but her muscles tug at her lips. The smile is real, not like the fake smiles she's been pulling for weeks.

"I guess so." The pill has been sitting under her tongue. The coating had all but completely dissolved away, now tasting very bitter. Jade takes another swig of the water, letting the pill go down finally. She notices that Cat's staring at her. "What?"

"Nothing!" She quickly says. "C'mon, I wanna watch a movie! Ooh, maybe we can watch _Beauty and the _Beast, or _Mr. Popper's Penguins! _The penguins are like little people in suits." Her voice is full of excitement, much like a child ten years younger than her. Chocolate brown eyes light up. But then, her voice becomes quieter. The light in her eyes die out. "Not unless… you want to go back to bed… then I'll understand. When I'm tired, I like to sleep in my bed. And snuggle up with my pillow pet."

Jade frowns. Quiet Cat doesn't fit well in her mind. She's seen many different sides of the redhead, but seeing Cat upset made her want to make her cheer up. Cat was the closest thing to her as a best friend. Jade may have hurt her, but she never really meant it. It was something she'd do without thinking. The velvety redhead has been hurting from how Jade was being reclusive since her treatment started. Guilt didn't affect her when telling lies to everyone else who didn't know, but she hates herself for causing the usually excited girl to act like this. But it was better for her to continue living in her world than face the reality. That was mainly why she treated her better than everyone else. Cat still lived in a world where evil doesn't exist while the rest of the world was full of it.

"I was just going to go take a shower. This is what I fell asleep in, and it feels like crap." She tugged at her shirt. "But I'll come back down and we'll do whatever you want." Oh god she wanted to take back the last part. "Whatever you want" could mean the range of Cat wanting to do a makeover on her to some other girly shit Jade hated. But when she sees the light return to her eyes the consequences didn't feel as bad.

"Okie dokie!" was all she said before skipping into the hallway to the living room. The girl really was a rollercoaster of emotions.

She sets the glass into the sink. Jade heads upstairs to the bathroom with the only shower in the house. When she enters the practically sparkling clean room, Jade turns the hot water knob. As she waits for the water to warm up, she strips out of shirt first, followed up by her jeans. Testing the water to see how hot it was, Jade hissed at the heat, yet turned the cold water knob to turn the temperature lukewarm, the only setting where her body doesn't ache. The second set of clothing she takes off is her undergarments. Her hand tests the temperature. Once satisfied, she steps in and lets the water droplets roll down her neck, chest, stomach, and thighs. The teen sighs in comfort, preferring to stand in relaxation than do anything else. She does do for about five minutes before picking up her shampoo to start thoroughly washing her locks. Afterwards goes in the conditioner. Throughout the whole ordeal she's waiting for a clump of hair to entangle themselves in between her fingers. Despite this internal fear none do. A sigh escapes. There's still some time left.

The next part was the dreadful part—washing her body.

Jade picks up the bottle of body wash (she'd refused to ever use a bar, that's just gross) and squeezes a handful into her palm. She begins with her arms, making her way to her chest and downwards. Ribcage is visible above her stomach. The pale thighs have faded its color to become paler than it was before from usually wearing pants all the time. Jade chews the inside of her cheek. Pity begins to creep inside her. Pushing the thought away, she finished the job.

Twisting the knobs to stop the flow of water, she exits the shower. Jade opens a nearby cabinet where the towels are kept folded. One is pulled out to dry herself off. Her eyes flicker around the room. It was then there when she remembered she didn't bring an extra set of clothes.

_Nice going Jade, you're such a genius. Cat's going to see you, ask questions, and the truth will come out. Maybe it does deserve to if you're so fucking stupid._

There was no way in hell that was going to happen. Perhaps one day, but definitively not today. She wraps the towel around her body and tucked part of the end in to hold its place, deciding she rather kick Cat out before answering anything in the realm of her body or the way she has been acting. It was for her own good.

She picks up the rest of her clothing. Jade then heads down the stairs, trying her best to hurry without making noise. The theme song for _The Fairly OddParents _was playing. Wow. Jade rolls her eyes. Of course Cat would be watching a kid's show. Thankfully it wasn't something worse, like _Dora the Explorer_. Hearing the rhetorical questions insulted her intelligence.

Jade reaches her room successfully. The worn clothes are dumped into a basket. She proceeds to put on some clean undergarments, a black lose fitting t-shirt she usually wears around the house, and some pants. After drying and warily brushing her locks, she puts on her usual makeup just enough to hide her rugged appearance. As Jade makes her way back upstairs, a knocking at her door causes her to pause before opening the door.

Standing there was Cat holding her ebony bra she was wearing by a strap. It dangles in between her pointer and middle finger. "You dropped something." Cat says, smirking and giggling at the same time as she tossed Jade's bra into her direction. She catches it. Watching Cat walk away Jade actually felt her face burning with embarrassment. She scowls. No way in hell did Jade ever _blush_, so why was she doing it now? The only times she turned red was from anger.

She tossed the dirty bra behind her, deciding she'll pick it up later. Jade enters the living room. Cat is now sitting on the couch squealing happily and cheering, "Yay Poof!" Jade turns her head to the screen. Brain cells begin to commit suicide upon seeing the animated show for a whopping five seconds.

"Change this. Now." Jade says. Cat turns around and lets her lower lip stick out, her form of protesting. "Change this damn thing or I'll put on _The Texas Chainsaw Massacre_," she threatens. "With the speakers loud."

Letting out a squeak, Cat picks up the remote, sets the guide up, and scrolls through the list of programs. Jade allows herself to smirk as she sits next to the redhead. Serves her right for making Jade feel what she felt earlier.

Cat settles on an hour-long Animal Planet show called (wouldn't you have guessed it) _Cats._ Something about discussing different feline breeds and then having the cats do tricks and other stuff to entertain its audience. Jade could barely contain her irritation at how cutesy the directors were portraying the animals. The only good thing that came out of this was watching in her peripheral vision how Cat responded. She clapped at the tricks the cats performed and awed at the kitten versions of the adults. It was pretty entertaining. Other than that, they sat without saying words. It wasn't awkward. They've known each other long enough for them to sit relaxed around each other.

Credits for the show begin rolling as well as a preview for the next show. "I'm thirsty," Cat pipes up.

"Well go get something then. I'm not your slave. You know where everything is."

"'Kay, 'kay." She jumps up and leaves the living room. Jade takes this opportunity to switch to something she wanted to watch.

When she's in the kitchen, Cat picks up a glass cup from the dish rack and sets it on the counter, not noticing the bottle of pills. She takes the carton of orange juice from the fridge, pours the orange liquid into the cup, and puts the carton away in its original place, humming a tune to herself. As she turns and picks up the glass, it causes the capsule to tip over, shaking the contents. Her eyes light up from the noise it created. Cat picks up the container and shakes it again, giggling. She does so while she walks back into the living room, making the beat follow her song.

Jade can hear the noise, but doesn't pay attention and only focused on finding something good to watch. It was only when Cat sits in her original spot when she notices what was in her hand. Eyes widening, she keeps her voice devoid of panic, a trait she's grateful for due to acting lessons. "Where'd you get that, Cat?"

"You rhymed." She giggles. "That. Cat. Mat. Hat—"

Jade interrupted her. "Answer the question."

Cat continues to shake it like it was an instrument. Jade feels she knows what the pills are actually for and she's taunting her, but that would be very out of character for her. Still, she cannot help herself. "I found them on the counter," she tilts her head at the container, now becoming curious about it. She doesn't notice the look of anxiety showing in Jade's bluish-green eyes. "It has your name on it! Jadelyn August West. Ox-ee-codone… what are they for, Jadey?"

"They're for my headaches." Headaches were her explanation to others for popping a lot of aspirin pills during the day. It wasn't far from the truth since headaches were a part of her symptoms. Yet the student body created rumors on what they really thought they were. The main story was she became depressed after the break-up between Beck and her and has turned to drugs as a way to cope. Although that was major bullshit on so many levels, she didn't care as long as the real truth was hidden. "Stop shaking it. You're making me have another one."

"Oh… okay." Cat stops shaking the bottle. She sips her drink before setting her cup and the bottle down. "Can we watch a cartoon movie?" Cat curls her body closer to Jade, causing her heart to jump in her chest at the warmth emitting from the shorter girl's body. "Please?"

"N-no," Jade manage to say. To avoid paying attention to the contact, she focuses on the television. She clicks on a random title. "Look, here's _Avatar_. It's like _Pocahontas_, but has tall blue cat people things."

"Yay, more cats!" Cat claps before resting her head on Jade's shoulder. Her vanilla-scented hair is prominent in Jade's nostrils. Her eyes close, becoming intoxicated at how good it smelt.

_Mmm, vanilla—oh great, now you're becoming Sinjin. What's next, you're gonna ask her for a lock of her hair? Damn, you have to get a hold of yourself and stop this obsession._

In the weeks following her break-up with Beck, Jade has noticed things in a new light. Or more specifically, people. Namely Cat. She's noticed how… touchy the girl was towards her. It wasn't uncommon for them to touch, but ever since she's become single Cat somehow thought this was a free pass to hold her hand longer than usual, or rest her hands lower than Jade is comfortable with whenever they hugged. At first she ignored this and thought it was some sort or paranoia, considering Cat was always like this. Yet now Cat's hand was resting in the middle of her thigh, and Jade is sure Cat could feel her thumping heart.

_Why the hell am I feeling like this? We always sit like this, it's normal, _she thinks, trying to come up with a reasonable answer. _It's because… it's because she might feel you bones. You're becoming a stick figure. She's bound to notice how thin you're becoming by just doing this. Yes, that's it._

She turns her head to the side, relinquishing the smell. Her movement caused Cat to notice her to turn away.

"Is everything all right, Jade?"

"Huh? What? What are you talking about?" Jade turns her face towards Cat, breath hitching when she realized Cat had plopped her chin upwards. Their faces were a few inches apart. She was now staring into Cat's brown orbs very intently. Jade can notice the lighter brown flecks around her irises. "Of course everything is all right. Why would you ask something like that?"

"We don't hang out like we used to do. And when we do, you act like I'm hurting you. Did I do something wrong?" Her voice is so full of innocent pain Jade felt a pain in her chest. The same pain she felt when Beck didn't open the door after her countdown.

"No Cat, you didn't do anything wrong. I'm just… going through a lot of stuff in my life. You know, Dad, his wife, and all." _And not to mention I have to deal with cancer._

She says softly, "You can tell me what's going on. I promise I won't tell anyone. Cross my heart, hope to die," Jade's gut wrenched at this, "or stick a noodle in my eye."

"I—what, noodle? You're kidding." Jade deadpanned. Cat shakes her head, causing Jade to sigh. There wasn't any use in fighting against Cat's logic. "Cat, nothing is wrong. I'm not feeling well, so what? I'm only a little sick. Everyone gets sick once in a while. It's normal."

Cat bites her lip. She wants Jade to tell her she knows she isn't telling the full truth. They've been friends for years, and she can tell when something is bothering her. Something was going on. Instead of pressing the subject, she rests her cheek on Jade's shoulder like the way she did before.

Jade could tell she didn't believe her. "I'm telling the truth."

"Mhmm."

She wasn't satisfied with the answer. Jade's stubbornness to prove her point was coming out. "I'm fi—" Her stomach wrenches again. Only one thing came out of this feeling. And they all ended up the same way. "I'm gonna hurl," she groans. Jade stands up, making Cat fall to the side. Clutching her stomach, she rushed to the bathroom. The teen didn't even turn on the light or close the door before dropping to her knees and vomiting into the bathroom's toilet, holding her body up by the floor. Body convulsing, she wipes her brow with the base of her knuckles, and empties another load. The foul odor of her stomach's contents makes her want to push herself away, but doesn't in case she needs to throw up again. When she's sure nothing is going come out, she flushed the toilet, feeling sicker due to seeing the vomit stained pink from blood.

Jade leans against the wall, closing her eyes and trying to relax. Hands shaking, she tried to reach the toilet paper roll to wipe her face, yet feels too weak to move. Her breathing evens out the longer she sat. Throughout this ordeal she can hear feet shuffling around her, undoubtedly Cat. She wants to clean herself to prove to Cat she was fine, but felt she didn't even have the strength to open her eyes. Jade wants to will her body for a little more energy.

The sound of toilet paper shearing followed up by the motion of someone rubbing around her mouth somehow causes her eyes to open. She sees Cat cleaning up what was left on her face. She remains emotionless. Jade can see the sadness and confusion in her eyes, and makes her want to push her away. "Stop," she mumbles. Cat continued. The girl finishes and then throws it away into the trash can.

"Stand up," Cat kneels down. She wraps her arm around Jade's hips, reaches for her left hand, and pulls her up. Jade wants to show her she was fine, so does her best to support her body with her legs. They take a few steps. Her legs buckle. Despite being considerably smaller, Cat manages to get her through the hallway and onto the couch. Jade is laid down gently as if she were a wounded animal. The redhead leaves momentarily, holding a glass of water. "Drink," she tells her. Cat sits down on the opposite end. Jade growls at the command, hating to be ordered around, but takes (alright, _snatches_) the glass away and gulps half of it down. "A little sick, huh?"

Jade's eyes flashed. "I'm fine."

"No you're not!" Cat shrieks, now losing it. "You're not fine, Jade. This isn't a little flu. You-you won't tell me what's really wrong with you! I deserve to know! I'm your best friend. Please Jadey; tell me what's really going on!" Her voice becomes high-pitched the more she talked. Jade was already angry at the fact she shown weakness, and this was making her infuriated.

"You know what? No, I don't have to fucking tell you every little thing going on in my life! You're not my mother, Cat! And wanna know something else? You don't get to yell at me in my home. Get the hell out of here!" Jade knows she'll regret this later, but gets too caught up in the moment. "Get out of my fucking house!"

Cat, now with tears staining her eyesight, doesn't say anything in retaliation. She gets up abruptly and runs out of the house, slamming the front door shut. Jade slams her glass down on the table. Well shit, things spun out of control fast.

"I hate my life."

Jade didn't mean to yell at Cat… okay, she did, but didn't mean to make her cry. Seeing her upset like this made her feel horrible, but it was for the best. She'd rather push Cat away than tell her she had leukemia. It would crush her.

"What did I ever do to deserve this?" Jade asks to no one in particular. "I never killed anyone, or seriously hurt someone. How come am I the one stuck with this disease?" She knows she'll never receive an answer. It was useless.

Although she wanted to text Cat and apologize, Jade has learned from quite a bit of experiences the best way was to let her calm down on her own. She picks up the remote and changes the movie, eyes flickering every now and then to the OJ that sat on the table.


End file.
